Jewish Dating: My Personal Experience

I would like to tell you a story about myself and how I found God and true love.

I came to the USA from Russia 26 years ago, a place where God and spiritual connections were suppressed, hardly recognized, and scarcely accepted.

Like most Russian Jews, we came to this country dreaming of a better life and prosperity, to freely express our religion and live within our Jewish traditions.

Immigrating to the USA was a divine act, meant to save us from the chaos unfolding in Russia and to direct our family towards a new beginning.

When I was 18, I had spent half of my life in the former USSR and half here in the USA. Thus, I think I got the best of both systems; I still have the upbringing and culture from Russia, but I have already embraced the American way of life.

Being a Russian Jewish woman practically narrows your choice of men to zero. Thus, being single, I met many local guys in the already established community of Russian Jews in Los Angeles.

Although I made many friends and dated a few young Jewish men, finding true love or someone I felt a strong connection with seemed quite a challenge.

Coming from a country where the average age for marriage is 18, I felt a slight pressure to find a husband.

However, looking around, I had to accept that most young Jews and non-Jews in the USA are not very keen to marry at such a young age.

Since we came from an atheistic country and our religion underwent significant changes, my faith in God was very minimal. Thus, during college, I tried to play the role of God myself, trying to find Mr. Right.

I met and started dating a few Jewish guys, but I never experienced the feelings that are inherent to first love. But then I met my very first true love.

We fell in love so that my feelings were beyond explanation. The best I can define as being in love is feeling butterflies in your stomach, dreaming about smiling cupids, and thinking about this person all the time. You gain a completely new outlook on life.

We were each other's first love; however, we both didn't really know how to behave in such serious relationships. I had trouble guarding and at the same time expressing my feelings.

Our relationship lasted several years, then we cooled off towards each other and parted ways. I think it happened because we were growing, discovering, and forming our characters and personalities. In the process, we lost the essence of why we were together.

Breaking up is never easy when your heart carries an emotional burden, and the pain that you think will never disappear. But as they say, "time is the best healer."

So, time went by, I tried to find peace of mind. And then God came to my aid.

He sent someone into my life, a friend who wasn't even of the Jewish faith, but who helped me find him and inspired me to find bliss and peace.

And, having found God, I was able to find a peace I had never known or encountered before in my life.

Being single again, I prayed to God every day about my life and how to find the right person for myself. I turned 27 and once again felt a strong desire to get married.

So, under interesting circumstances, I met someone I had known before, who was a great friend and easy to talk to. Although I had no chemistry with this person, I felt he completely compensated for it with his personality. And I thought that would be enough to have a serious relationship.

We got married. My communication and relationship with God dwindled, and the only reminder of God I had were the Jewish holidays that we celebrated with the family.

However, less than two years later and childless, I realized that individuality and friendship were not enough to sustain a relationship. We started having problems, and the relationship came to an end.

So, I "happily" broke off the relationship and tried to move on with my life.

I was so glad it was over because I realized that I could have spent the best years of my life with someone who was not suitable for me and with whom we had no chemistry.

Divorce is usually not an easy time; however, we made the "best" of it, without drama or escalation.

Then I was free again… and turned to God again. I asked God why I had gone through all these unnecessary upheavals in my life, why he had allowed me to go through all this.

And I uncovered the truth about all this: in life we make choices; and those decisions are not mandatory for God's path or God's will. Sometimes we just take risks, but it doesn't mean that God wrote this for us in His Book of Life.

Therefore, I set out again to find a relationship. I felt a bit disillusioned and pessimistic. I spent some time alone and believe that solitude can be important for your emotional healing and for your mental state.

In the meantime, I became more spiritual and came closer to God.

I found more inner peace than I could have imagined. Reading the Torah and spiritual quests became an important part of my daily life.

At some point later, I felt it was time to start dating again.

Blind dates, which some friends and relatives arranged, were not successful.

There was also a limited circle of single Russian Jewish men who were available.

Many single Jews slightly older than thirty were already married or in relationships.

Visiting popular places for single Russian Jews, such as restaurants and clubs, became outdated and could not be considered a place to meet anyone.

I constantly prayed and asked God for a miracle.

And soon after that, I discovered online dating.

Online dating for bachelors at that time was hardly popular, so I was not very keen to sign up for one of these online dating services.

Some single Jewish men and women would be very pessimistic about it; it was considered that turning to online dating was complete desperation!

But I kept going, something inside me was pushing me forward.

I wanted to find acquaintance and naturalness in these types of dating services.

First, I registered on a Jewish dating site to minimize attempts to find only single Jewish men. I was excited and nervous at the same time.

I liked the fact that these services are available exclusively for single Jews. It was a great relief to know that so many professionally accomplished, single, men your age and living in Los Angeles are looking for their Jewish half. The entire online dating experience was quite safe and unobtrusive.

You would receive emails from the online dating service notifying you that someone is interested in you. And you don't need to respond if you don't see any kind of attraction or connection. Now the number of potential grooms was simply endless. Search criteria allow you to find someone with similar beliefs and personal qualities.

So, I believed that God directed me to the Jewish online dating site to find my Mr. Right.

Of course, I met my prince right along the way. It was about four years ago.

He turned out to be exactly what I asked for and prayed to God for! Tall, dark, and handsome. A fantastically caring person. We fell in love immediately.

I felt as if God had sanctified our love and relationship!

When we first met, we both concluded that it was meant to be, and that we were soulmates. We felt that our previous relationships were just steps on the path to each other. It was a long road for both of us, but we found it here, on a Jewish dating site.

He is an amazing person who, by the way, had a hard time, but who knows how to value relationships and is not afraid to show his feelings. Since then we have been married, we have a three-year-old daughter. We give each other love and support each other unconditionally. We constantly work on our relationships and always inspire each other to creativity and imagination. Now I know more than ever that he is the one for me!

This union would never have happened if not for the divine power and intervention of God. And the Internet, the Jewish online dating service, he used as a tool to unite us.

Despite the fact that we lived in the same city, there is a chance that we would never meet.

God finds ways for you to meet the person who will make your world spin!

I have never stopped believing and praying to God since then.

Not a day goes by that I don't thank him for everything I have today.

No matter what life throws at me. I trust him, my experiences, and he never lets me down.

Some days are good, and some days are better, but when I look into my daughter's eyes, nothing else in the world matters! When she reaches out to me and says she loves me,

I feel like this is the pinnacle of my life.

In conclusion, I hope that all Jewish singles who are looking for their love will definitely find it!

Keep your faith and believe in the supernatural power; don't stop waiting for your miracle!

Tatiana V.